I’m discovering that the key to adulthood is priorities. I’m also discovering that the hardest part about adulthood is figuring out what your priorities actually are.
I’m discovering the hard way that both time and money are precious commodities and that you never have as much as you think you need.
I’m also learning that although I fully believe that your dreams can come true, that not ALL of your dreams can come true, at least not at once.
I’m learning that you can’t actually become the best writer in the world and the best cook in the world and the best girlfriend in the world and read an entire stack of books and be the best journalist in the world and be the best friend in the world and train for a marathon and have the cleanest, most pin-worthy apartment– you get the idea – all at the same time.
I’m learning that sometimes you have to pick and choose what’s going to be important in a season – that in order to grasp onto something fully, you must let go of something else.
And I’m learning how good that is.
I’m also learning how hard it is too.
It’s frustrating and humbling to admit that your entire to-do list can’t be completed all in a focused Thursday afternoon. It’s hard to realize that work has to be put away for awhile in order to give your relationships space to thrive– and that not everybody enjoys becoming an item on your to-do list right after ‘buy more toilet paper.’
This is even harder to put into practice, I’m realizing, because work is one of those pesky things that likes to remain right at the top of your mind, even when you’d rather be thinking about more fluffy, weekend-type things.
But again, I’m learning about priorities.
I’m learning that things can wait. I’m learning that sometimes work really can wait until Monday, or if a blog doesn’t go up promptly at 7am, that it’s really ok.
I’m learning that there’s a sweetness to tossing your cell phone in a drawer for the weekend, but that there’s a different (but equal) sweetness to picking it back up again on Monday and doing the hard work that you were made to do.
But most of all, I’m learning that priorities don’t happen on their own. If we’re not careful, our to-do lists can grow until we fall apart under the weight of them, and that if we don’t learn to say ‘no,’ we run the risk of actually going crazy. I’m learning that time has to be set apart, on purpose, and if it isn’t, it certainly wont happen on it’s own.
And I’m learning that this is ok.
I don’t want to live a mediocre life in every area that makes its way onto my list. I want to live a life that’s very much on purpose – intentional and chosen. I want my life to reflect what’s most important to me, and my time to be spent on the things that bring me, and those I love, life.
And that takes priorities. It takes some ruthless chopping as you notice things that snuck their way in without asking permission.
Bob Goff talks about how he quits something every Thursday. He is constantly editing his life, cutting out the things that clutter up what really matters.
“I used to be afraid of failing at something that really mattered to me, but now I’m more afraid of succeeding at things that don’t matter.”
~ Bob Goff
So these days, I’m working on priorities. I’m an ‘aspiring quitter.’ I’m making lists of the ways I spend my time and cutting some out. It feels ruthless really, but once those things are gone, there’s room for the things that really matter.
I don’t want to successfully complete someone else’s life. I want to thrive in the one that’s perfectly designed for me.
What’s taking you away from the life you were meant to live?